When people take advantage of your relationship with Christ
Well, I've had an very eventful weekend...On Friday I was giving a church member a ride from church and she stole money out of my wallet...Yeah, I know. I shouldn't have left my wallet in the car with her but I made a quick run into Wendys to some hot sauce and didn't think about it. We were coming from church and to avoid her spending three hours on the bus for the ride home since she lived no more than 10 mins away from where I live I decided to offer her a ride. I try to be Godly, because I know how it is not to have a ride and have to take the bus. Well, at first I was like I really don't want to accuse her of stealing my money when I have no proof but I remember counting the cash and putting it bak in my wallet and putting it in the side pocket of the door. So I'm gonna say how it all started.
She begged me to let her pay for the food, which at the time I didn't find odd but later I did because I know that she is unemployed she has four children and she's trying to get government assistance but its not working out right for her, but I let her pay cause I felt guilty when she said "How come you never let me pay for anything?". And BTW she was using dollars and quarters to pay for the food, I felt bad that she had to do that but now it hit me. She was just in church asking if we could help her out with a few dollars and now she was offering to pay for the food?
So when I went to the store that night to get something I realized I didn't have my money so I called her and she never answered. I kept calling and calling her and I never got an answered, so when I called the next morning suprisingly I got an answer. I told her that I lost my money and I didn't know where it was. Then, she admitted to the crime
ummm, excuse me?
Did you just say that you took my money, but you'll give it back on Monday when you think that you'll get a check? What do you think that was? A loan? You stole my money. You didn't borrow it, you didn't recieve it as a gift, and you didn't earn it...You stole it. That's a crime and it's not right. I didn't yell my voice and I didn't go ghetto on her, I just wanted to know why she took my money. I never mistreated her I was ALWAYS nice to her, I never gave her a reason to steal from me. So why would she do that? I couldn't understand it. If you need some money just simply ask!!! I don't have much but I'll give you some of what I have..it still helps, right? Did she not think I was going to find out? Then after I told her how I felt, she says:
"Well, I have free chic-fil-a coupon for a free meal that you can have." Still, to this day I don't know if she was joking or if she was actually serious. I really hope that she was trying to lighten the mood...So I'm wondering now....
Am I too nice? I tried to be Godly because she's a church member not to say that all church members are saved but, I felt the need to help her out. Maybe God allowed this to show her something...I know that it was only 60 dollars but, it was my hard earned 60 dollars!!! I needed that money, it was saved for a reason. So, I'm wondering if I'm just too nice and I put too much trust in people when I'm just trying to be Godly. My walk with Christ and the way I treat people may bring them closer to God...and me being taken advantage of just makes me wonder if I did something wrong or if I became too comfortable with her. If I plan to minister to someone I want them to feel comfortable around me and not feel as though I don't actually care for them because really I do....
Soo, I saw her earlier and she was on the street cause like I said, she's struggling and she's unemployed...but she does come to church regulary...I saw her standing in the median with a sign, asking people to give her money....I didn't stop today, I just kept going....was that wrong for me to do or no?
Should I have stopped? I'm confused, I wanted to stop but I didn't want to set myself up again. Because, I was mad but then again like I said, I'm not responsible for the way people treat me and I can't punish anyone for doing me wrong because as a Christian I am still supposed to treat them right no matter how they treat me, right? But, I've all ways heard the saying: fool me once, shame on you. fool me twice, shame on me.
I'm soo stuck in the middle with this...I didn't ride pass her to be mean but, I did it because I felt betrayed, I mean I considered her a friend, she would talk to me about her problems, she would cry to me about things that were going on and I would encourage her and just hold her and tell her that God was going to work it out and pray with her and everything. She was a part of our women's ministry and she stole from me? I know times are rough, but it's rough for everyone...she knew all she had to do was ask...especially when we were just talking about that in Bible Study about how its important to help each other out because its the Godly thing to do...like I said, I felt led to help her...but I'm just going have to give this to God and let him handle it...People have told me that the money is going to come back to me double and if it does, then Amen, and if it doesn't then Amen again...God still supplies and he's still in control...
God Bless and Thanks for reading!!!!
-BRE
VW
She begged me to let her pay for the food, which at the time I didn't find odd but later I did because I know that she is unemployed she has four children and she's trying to get government assistance but its not working out right for her, but I let her pay cause I felt guilty when she said "How come you never let me pay for anything?". And BTW she was using dollars and quarters to pay for the food, I felt bad that she had to do that but now it hit me. She was just in church asking if we could help her out with a few dollars and now she was offering to pay for the food?
So when I went to the store that night to get something I realized I didn't have my money so I called her and she never answered. I kept calling and calling her and I never got an answered, so when I called the next morning suprisingly I got an answer. I told her that I lost my money and I didn't know where it was. Then, she admitted to the crime ummm, excuse me?Did you just say that you took my money, but you'll give it back on Monday when you think that you'll get a check? What do you think that was? A loan? You stole my money. You didn't borrow it, you didn't recieve it as a gift, and you didn't earn it...You stole it. That's a crime and it's not right. I didn't yell my voice and I didn't go ghetto on her, I just wanted to know why she took my money. I never mistreated her I was ALWAYS nice to her, I never gave her a reason to steal from me. So why would she do that? I couldn't understand it. If you need some money just simply ask!!! I don't have much but I'll give you some of what I have..it still helps, right? Did she not think I was going to find out? Then after I told her how I felt, she says:
"Well, I have free chic-fil-a coupon for a free meal that you can have." Still, to this day I don't know if she was joking or if she was actually serious. I really hope that she was trying to lighten the mood...So I'm wondering now....
Am I too nice? I tried to be Godly because she's a church member not to say that all church members are saved but, I felt the need to help her out. Maybe God allowed this to show her something...I know that it was only 60 dollars but, it was my hard earned 60 dollars!!! I needed that money, it was saved for a reason. So, I'm wondering if I'm just too nice and I put too much trust in people when I'm just trying to be Godly. My walk with Christ and the way I treat people may bring them closer to God...and me being taken advantage of just makes me wonder if I did something wrong or if I became too comfortable with her. If I plan to minister to someone I want them to feel comfortable around me and not feel as though I don't actually care for them because really I do....
Soo, I saw her earlier and she was on the street cause like I said, she's struggling and she's unemployed...but she does come to church regulary...I saw her standing in the median with a sign, asking people to give her money....I didn't stop today, I just kept going....was that wrong for me to do or no?
Should I have stopped? I'm confused, I wanted to stop but I didn't want to set myself up again. Because, I was mad but then again like I said, I'm not responsible for the way people treat me and I can't punish anyone for doing me wrong because as a Christian I am still supposed to treat them right no matter how they treat me, right? But, I've all ways heard the saying: fool me once, shame on you. fool me twice, shame on me.
I'm soo stuck in the middle with this...I didn't ride pass her to be mean but, I did it because I felt betrayed, I mean I considered her a friend, she would talk to me about her problems, she would cry to me about things that were going on and I would encourage her and just hold her and tell her that God was going to work it out and pray with her and everything. She was a part of our women's ministry and she stole from me? I know times are rough, but it's rough for everyone...she knew all she had to do was ask...especially when we were just talking about that in Bible Study about how its important to help each other out because its the Godly thing to do...like I said, I felt led to help her...but I'm just going have to give this to God and let him handle it...People have told me that the money is going to come back to me double and if it does, then Amen, and if it doesn't then Amen again...God still supplies and he's still in control...
God Bless and Thanks for reading!!!!
-BRE
VW
Total Comments 12
Comments
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I know that the bible tells us that we should turn the other cheek, but it also tells us not to be foolish. I think that allowing yourself to get into a situation where she could steal from you again would be foolish, as you stated in your blog. I don't see anything wrong with not picking her up. It's not as though she were asking people on the street for a ride. I may be biased on this issue though, as I know this would have really upset me if it happened to me.
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Posted 06-11-2009 at 06:11 PM by evanny
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Gosh VW, I honestly would have passed her by as well. Church member or not, she STOLE from you and would have to EARN that trust back. You are not foolish and you ain't wrong either....God led you to help her and she did wrong. I understand you feel guilty cause you have a good heart, but don't let it make you a fool or easy target.
God bless, and I hope she comes to you, woman to woman and works it out. |
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Posted 06-14-2009 at 03:14 PM by Marsy
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Maybe the lesson wasn't for you but for her. She now knows that abusing the trust f those who try to help her will result in being shunned, mistrusted, and in some cases looked down upon. And no matter what you say, $60 is ALOT of money or she wouldn't have stolen it and you wouldn't have missed it. Bless you girl!
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Posted 06-14-2009 at 08:26 PM by Tall, Black Canadian
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Thanks ladies, I've been praying about it and I actually was mad at myself because I thought maybe I'm too nice to people but I haven't seen her since I passed her, and when I did see her it was hot and she was sweating really bad and looked like she was crying, but I still couldn't stop, honestly I didn't know if it was because I was upset or that I didn't want to be involved with that, but I won't stop praying for her and that tops anything that I can give to her...
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Posted 06-14-2009 at 10:24 PM by virtuouswoman
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Quote:
but I won't stop praying for her and that tops anything that I can give to her...
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Posted 06-15-2009 at 11:57 PM by creolesugar
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Yeah, I'm going to ask one of the ministers at church what they would have done....
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Posted 06-16-2009 at 03:52 AM by virtuouswoman
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I sure would do that. I most definately would go to a minister in the church and let them know what happened.
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Posted 06-17-2009 at 07:58 PM by evanny
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I suggest the same thing, evanny said, please tell the preacher about this...this is something that should be addressed by the preacher to her...
She was dead wrong, and you were not wrong for passing her by, she sounds like the kind to take advantage of kind hearted person....pray for her, but don't be a fool. And 60 is a significant amount of money to steal, I was thinking it was a few bucks... |
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Posted 06-19-2009 at 12:18 PM by denalove
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Yeah, I'm going to talk to someone about it Sunday because I just found out that she's the secretary of the youth ministry....
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Posted 06-19-2009 at 10:23 PM by virtuouswoman
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oh,no!! That can't be a good thing...
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Posted 06-20-2009 at 12:57 AM by denalove
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Hi, did you get a chance to speak to anyone about the situation? I hope it all works out.
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Posted 06-21-2009 at 04:12 PM by Marsy
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yes we talked and she broke down crying and was saying how its so hard for her shes a really hard for her and shes been clean for three years and shes thinking about returning to heroin because of this and she has no diapers for her babies and all kinds of stuff and thats why she stole, then the pastors wife was telling her she should have come to the church because they give out free stuff all the time and she knows that and she was saying how did she think it makes me feel and she needs to act like a christian instead of just saying it, so she no longer holds a position in the youth ministry...but I'm praying for her and I hate that I had to go talk to someone but it was for her better because now she can really get what she needs instead of stealing thats not Godly, but the pastors wife told me she really was proud of me for coming to one of the other ladies about the situation....
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Posted 06-21-2009 at 08:55 PM by virtuouswoman
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Recent Blog Entries by virtuouswoman
- test blog (11-02-2009)
- When people take advantage of your relationship with Christ (06-08-2009)
- Psalm 139:14 (05-24-2009)
